This blog challenge is to spend some time thinking about the biggest obstacle currently holding you back from what you want. Is there a skill you are missing at work, a relationship that you need to rekindle or end? Define your main obstacle that stand between you and achieving your desire. The key question is not what you really want, but if you are willing to make some changes and put a true effort there.
If you already have received one of my cards, then you probably had the chance to see this sentence ‘the obstacle is the path’ appearing on the back of the card. This statement might be one of my biggest beliefs right now both in life and in work so you might ask how and why?
As the saying comes from a Zen story. Like many Zen stories, at first they don’t make sense (just like life and it’s events), but with some reflection they should start to become clear and ready to apply in our everyday life. The story about this saying goes;
In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on the main roadway in the city. The king believed that his kingdom was falling off as the attitude of his people was too. He thought they had lost inspiration and lacked creativity. So he placed the boulder and watched to see if anyone would remove what seems at first impossible to remove.
The merchants came towards the rock and said, “Well, this boulder is blocking our path. Let’s turn around and go home. No work today!” And they turned around and left. Next a group of soldiers came upon the boulder. “This rock is blocking our path and no one can move it ” they said. “I guess no one will need our services today”, and they turned around and went home as the others.
Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of their way. Doesn’t that sound familiar? This reminds me of when i was little and i had a big test in school. I would wake up and feel really sick the first minutes I opened my eyes and explain to my mother how I should stay and rest.
First stage; Avoidance! tricking ourselves into why we have the right to not face the obstacle and instead turning away from it.
Second stage; blame, we blame God even if we don’t believe in her or him, our destiny, the world, the person who is associated with presenting the obstacle, blaming institutions, culture, the time we are living in, our children, our partner, name it, this can go for ever using blame mechanisms in order to avoid the fact that we need to face this obstacle. And if you have succeeded to totally avoid the rock on your way, and blame it on someone else, so you never again need to face it, then I assure you, you have a lot of rocks lying there in your way and you have a voice inside you saying “WHY ME WHY ME!!!”I don’t always like Paulo Coelho’s books but in his book, The Warrior of the Light, here is one perfect way that he manages to describe the obstacle and the path;
From Paulo Coelho’s book, The Warrior of the Light:
A Warrior of the Light knows that certain moments repeat themselves.
He often finds himself faced by the same problems and situations, and seeing these difficult situations return, he grows depressed, thinking that he is incapable of making any progress in life.
“I’ve been through all this before,” he says to his heart.
“Yes, you have been through all this before,” replies his heart. “But you have never been beyond it.” Then the Warrior realizes that these repeated experiences have but one aim: to teach him what he does not want to learn.
And so back to our Zen story, an old man came approaching the boulder and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining the rock was still not moving. Instead of giving up into discourage like the others he got excited by the challenge and the creative process of finding a solution. When he realized pushing would not work and began to think of other solutions. The old man found a long wooden pole. He placed the pole under the boulder moved the boulder slightly. He repeated this process until the boulder was off the road. The old man was about to set off down toward the city but he noticed a bag lying where the boulder once stood. He picked up the bag and found gold coins and a note. He carefully opened the note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder. The kingdom was meant to learn what the old man had learned and what many of us never understand – Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.
We will not have any gold coins at the end of every obstacle we learn to deal with but the reward lies in us becoming stronger, more confident and less manipulating to others and to ourselves. When there’s an obstacle, don’t go around it or hide from it. Don’t run from it or get paralyzed by it, staring at it as if it is the end. Go into it and let it sink into you, give it time, work with it, explore it. Learn how to be with it and with the challenge its bringing into your life. Deal with it, and if you do, you’ll have a skill for life and your path will become easier and clearer.
You might feel defeated, jealous, angry, weak, impatient, stressed, in different. You can deal with any of these issues, if you are willing to go into them, and see why they arise in you. Its important to feel OK with experiencing these discomforts without trying immediately to erase the discomfort, because once you understand the cause of them, you can apply a better and more long standing solution to your obstacle than by just reacting to the symptoms.
